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The One Thing That Changed Everything for Me

May 18, 2025

What's your one thing?

Most of us can point to a single moment, loss, or lesson that shaped everything after it. A turning point. A wake-up call. A shift in how we see the world, and ourselves.

For me, I can think of a top five. But the one thing that truly changed everything happened when I was just 22 years old: my dad passed away.

It hit me hard. My whole life, I had this quiet drive to make him proud. Not because he was hard to please. He wasn't. I always felt loved and supported. But I had this deep inner desire not to disappoint him. If he questioned a grade or offered advice, I took it seriously. Not as criticism, but as guidance. I wanted to keep growing, improving, maybe to reflect the best parts of him back at him.

And then, just like that, he was gone.

Robert Bob Dolan of Viewhaven Nursery running a race in Damascus, Maryland
My dad, Bob Dolan, doing what he loved.

At first, it felt like a part of that drive left with him. Like the audience I had been performing for was no longer there. But as time passed, something deeper emerged. I started to realize that I could still live in a way that honored him. That he could still be proud, even if I couldn't hear it. That I didn't need his physical presence to feel his influence. In fact, maybe now, it was even stronger.

Even now, I can feel him watching. Thinking. Smiling. And sometimes, just sometimes, I still imagine the conversations we'd be having. The advice he'd give. The way he'd probably raise his eyebrow at something I said, or be quietly proud of how far I've come.

So yeah, that was my one thing. The moment that changed everything. Not all at once, but slowly, reshaping the way I move through the world, the way I chase purpose, and the way I define success.

Now I'll ask you again…

What's your one thing?

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